What do you say about the Detroit Lions that hasn’t been said already? More importantly, what do you say about the Detroit Lions that anyone is going to give a bleep about?

I had to ask the internet who their new head coach was; I couldn’t have remembered if you put a gun to my head. Turns out it’s Jim Schwartz, and according to his Wikipedia page, he’s been the defensive coordinator in Tennessee for the last eight seasons. Huh. Scott Linehan is the new offensive coordinator, coming off a head coaching job in St. Louis and who oversaw Minnesota’s pretty damn good 2004 season as OC. Gunther Cunningham rounds out the defensive portion of the coaching overhaul in Detroit. All I know about Gunther Cunningham is that the name Gunther is funny to me, and that he used to coach for the Chiefs at some point. I vaguely remember his name being associated with Chicago before Dick Jauron was hired. Good ol’ Dick.

So the Lions lost all sixteen games last year, and even though they lost a decent amount of squeakers…they lost all sixteen. Really close, winnable games slipped away at Chicago in Week 9, and they got legitimately jobbed Oct. 12th at Minnesota. The Vikes needed an ultra-bogus PI call in the last 2 minutes to steal a win at home.

They were no doubt a crappy team, and newly-minted Bears assistant head-coach Rod Marinelli had a lot to do with it. In fairness, the Matt Millen GM legacy didn’t leave him much to work with. Marinelli’s defensive prowess was good enough for dead last in the league, and his offense was 27th. That about wraps it up for the Rod Regime in Detroit.

The bright spots at Ford Field amounts to the foundation the Lions can count on: Kevin Smith and Calvin Johnson. FP is already on record as endorsing Kevin Smith’s potential, and Calvin Johnson’s unchallenged status as the Lion’s no. 1 wideout will produce more than the 1300+ yards he had last year. They made Matthew Stafford a filthy rich man and still have Daunte Culpepper (reunited with Scott Linehan) vying for the starting slot at QB.

The offense seems to have some talent, but the defense will have to improve. They can’t get any worse after giving up 30 or more points in 11 games last year. It would be silly to try to make it seem like Detroit had much of a shot at making an impact, but there’s always the thought of the ‘08 Dolphins, who went from 1-15 in ‘07 to 11-5 and a division championship. No one expects that kind of turnaround, but the Lions will improve by default, and the NFC North isn’t strong enough to justify the attention it’s getting these days. 6 wins is realistic, and don’t be shocked when division rivals blow it at Ford Field in 2009.